And lets talk about ISIS demanding female cirumcision, and how that isnt mentioned anywhere in the Quran

Fuck ISIS. I want to blame GWB for this but this would have happened anyway.

I don’t often agree with or even acknowledge coketalk but she made a great point recently. I think everyone would give up the chance at a million dollars if it weren’t tied so dramatically to peace in the middle east. Give me actual peace and not some tribal cease and desist, and I’ll stop bombing you. Done.

Before she crapped out on me. We’re pretty when we want to be!

Before she crapped out on me. We’re pretty when we want to be!

I just heard the Frozen song in its entirety for the first time ever

It’s no Under the Sea. Kids these days.

As predicted, D had to call it a night early, and now I’m kickin’ it solo, as usual.

I just want somebody to hang out with me for a night without it being a goddamn issue.

Goddammit, Spirit Airlines

D was supposed to arrive last night at 11:50, which was already past my bedtime since I have to work today. Apparently one of the flight attendants in Oakland had to be hauled off the plane on a stretcher for reasons that aren’t entirely clear, and it delayed the flight by 4 fucking hours. So now she’s supposed to get here around 4:15, so here I am.

Compounding matters was the fact that I could tell just via text that D was druuuuuunk at the airport, so I couldn’t get a straight answer out of her about any of it, and I had to leave my phone on so she could call/text with status updates, so I really haven’t had the best quality or quantity of sleep. Really hoping that SHE managed to get some sleep on the plane though, because I am not up for drunk nonsense this morning. I’ve gotta pick her up, turn around and come home, then get ready for work. Love her to death, but she is and always has been my karmic payback for every annoying/flaky thing I’ve ever done under the influence.

He’s too lazy to sit up and chew on his stick.

He’s too lazy to sit up and chew on his stick.

Tags: WALTER

Because I am as sneaky as my dog during a midnight trash can raid, T figured out that D and I are conspiring for her to live here while she job hunts in Austin

"I told her it wouldn’t be 24/7 party time!"

"Are you saying that for me or for yourself?"

My LivingSocial Daily Gem is “Tickets to SausageFest”

What exactly are you trying to say, LivingSocial?

Would ya believe that’s natural? A curling iron hasn’t touched my hair in years.

T is insisting on buying the band a beer. Like, overly insisting. So that’s what’s up in the burbs of Ft Worth tonight. Great hair and annoying the band.